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All kinds of shit

January 13, 2011

It’s always exciting to come to a new place, but you need to learn what’s where when. The primary reason for my little trip in the pitch-dark afternoon/night, was to find the local supermarket. You would think it’s impossible to find anything after sunset, but by some sort of a miracle (plus some investigating on Google’s maps) I managed to find it on my first attempt! As I rapidly approached the entrance, I noticed that there was no light coming from the store. Unfortunately, the store closed at 6.30 – I was there 6.37! Shit!

I stood outside the store for a bit, cursing the store, Wjik aan Zee and my poor karma. As I turned around, headed for the sidewalk, I saw a very big shadow coming towards me. I dare you guess what it was! It turns out that the sidewalk is not only for humans: A girl was quietly leading her horse home on the poorly lighted pavement. My heart jumped a bit as I understood it was an animal more than twice my size, but the girl’s firm grip on its reins was comforting enough to calm down. I let them get a good head-start while I focused on a local map. After determining that there was no alternate store indicated on the map, and the horse was safely gone, I continued to find my way back. By chance, I concentrated on the ground in front of me just as I was about to step into a pile of shit – literally speaking. Shit! In principle I’m okey with ‘them’ borrowing our pavements, but they should have to find a toilet somewhere else.

By now, I thought things couldn’t go much worse, so I decided to extend my trip a bit. My goal was to find the Zeeduin hotel, and the path over the sand dunes, which connects the Zeeduin and my hotel Hoge Duin. Just as I was about to find the path, two loose dogs were approaching me. Shit! Now, as you might have understood with the horse, I’m not very into animals. And dogs freak me out more than anything. They have a tendency of sniffing you, and if they like what they smell, who knows if they’ll take a bite! Now, I’ve never smelled that attractive to any doge – luckily. But keep in mind that I might have leftovers of horse shit on my shoes, a delicacy for all dogs according to something I saw on TV. I froze completely, but then remembered all the TV-shows where they say ‘animals sense fear’ and how your fear makes them think they are superior. However, knowing what to do and doing it are two completely different things. I continued pretending to be a statue – which admittedly does increase the chance of them pissing on you, or is that a fire hydrant? Summa summarum, it worked brilliantly, and they passed me without any sniffing and/or worse.

I found the path I was looking for, and I could see my hotel. My dangerous trip was almost over. Light rain can often be very refreshing and soothing. In Wjik aan Zee, that is absolutely not the case! The rain itself is no problem for a ‘bergenser’ (person born in Bergen – a city infamous for its rain) but I could easily do without the wind! The breeze directs the raindrops straight onto my face. Shit! Needless to say, these last couple of minutes on the sand dunes were not the warmest ever. Though, thanks to my excellent navigational skills, I managed to find the hotel entrance before any permanent damage was made. All I needed was to warm up in my room.

First trips are not always that eventful, luckily – but if you’ll excuse me, I’ll have to go back to that supermarket now! This time I’ll do it while it’s light outside, and with a firm eye on the ground in front of me!

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Ronja_Northern permalink
    January 13, 2011 22:35

    Seriously I can’t help laughing of these fears of yours=) Because I can’t understand how you can be scared of dogs or horses, they are so nice! Though, I can relate it to fear of dangerous people ready to attack one walking alone in a dark street.

    The thinking part is also entertaining, that you could remember that animal can sense fear and so on, but like you said, doing it, is another thing for sure. I do sometimes think of what I would have to do, if I get attacked, and I think of course of my taekwon-do.
    But it always strikes me, that I am not warm enough to do that kick I am thinking of. And somehow I seriously doubt an attacker would let me do a warm up. And even if I was warm, my jeans would enable my high kick anyway. So normally I move on to some other self defense techniques, but you see, we learn one attack at the time and they are a bit or actually quite precise, so I suppose I may end up in a situation where I would have to ask the attacker to change the attack, cuz I have learned a self defense against that attack with another hand position or he has bend down or loose some weight, simple cuz he too large for me to stand a chance. So what I normally end up with some basic self defense. But for all I know, I might become a statue too in a real situation, though, I do not think of that walking in a dark street;)

    Anyway, a funny self ironic story!

  2. Duncan Vella permalink
    January 14, 2011 08:28

    LOL. That’s a nice way to start a Friday morning… reading your blog and laughing.
    You know what they say. Stepping on shit augurs well. It’s a sign of good luck.
    Hope you have a great tournament.

  3. Govatsmark Konstantin permalink
    January 15, 2011 17:42

    How romantic. -“Rain drops…” “Shit on the asfalt..”.

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